Sir Real (vartikk) wrote in burning_man,
Sir Real
vartikk
burning_man

My BM entry from my journal Copied to you

OK I didn't keep a real journal, just kinda notes...so here is was it all comes out to basically
Friend Key so that you know who is who and who has what strange names and a little back ground on them

Vince= Tattoo artist in San Francisco.
Brian= Lord Huckleberry, Charismatic Head of Dust Fish , Kinda a Uncle
"Dust Fish"= A group of people/Artist who hang out and party in the city, we also put on a camp at Burning man
Kurt= my best male friend from Florida
Megan= My best Female friend from Florida
Bernal=Robert, who goes by bernal , he is cool guy who camped with Dustfish, we became close friends
Polaroid=Jason , He is my Dust Fish Sister...we look just alike ( yes we both are males)
Opal=Adrian , Female head of Dust fish..the brains behind it all
Swizzle=Jason, one of the Dustfish
Dae= Cool Dust fish guy who DJed and is Esters best friend
Ester= Dust fish female who is awesome
Nome=Will , DJ with the Dust fish, Ester's brother in law
others will be described as they come up..they will not pop up much in future posts

Sat.
Today , I packed , had breakfast w/ Vince.. Then I took off to meet Polaroid, and we began our drive to burningman , I talked to Megan while I was on the way up and she was hiding things from me, I feel really shitty about that...I would kick her if she was near right now...Oh well. I am sure there is a reason I need to try to keep my hopes up for the week ahead
8:30pm
We made it to Burning man and set up our camp.. I am beat i am going to bed

Sunday
We began putting together the stage today. This night i went for a walk with Ester and i think we bonded really well. Not to much more exciting , We Tromped across the desert looking for a place to dance , I really think i like Ester alot, it is kinda scary that my attraction to older women is so blind... I thought she was younger then me for as long as i have been an aquantenance to her...We went way out in the desert to Find the rubber Duckey were we met Sid for the first time..she is great and full of energy , The sun is cresting the horizon it is time to get some sleep before the sun melts my flesh.
---
Oh yeah , i went to the DPW party within the man tonight. it was cool i went up to the top of the Watchtower thingy

Monday
Today we continued to build the stage and the bar... Dust Fish will soon be together...we have gotten the two shafts of our giant penis's constructed.. the crane is supposed to be here tomorrow ( it didn’t make it till Wednesday) , Tonight i went out on the playa again, and against my promise that i was gonna stay clean( mostly to my self) I took some mushrooms a camp mate gave me and went tromping around the desert with Kurt.. we decided that we are gonna start a artistic revoloution..basically just to piss people off ( god damn the punk in us) we danced and eventually found the breeching whale way out there...it was pretty damned cool, Exhaustion sunk in and we went back to camp to rest

Tuesday
I dreamt of Megan, Ester , and a co-worker of mine last night.. It was strange. each one was falling and i could only save one of their lives. Ester lived.. I wonder if this means something or just has to do with the fact that she is a camp mate of mine, and i did mushrooms last night. Eh, well anyway Kurt played Guitar today , and i found out we are part of the bead game , you try to get 5 of 5 different colors and you get a gold coin...sounds like fun.. Also from Steve23 i found out about the infamous pink chips at the golden ducky...Woo Hoo I want one of those ( they are used to collect sexual favors from people at the rubber duck..or well anyone who will take one for that) so anyway were was i.. Today i talked to Ester for a while and i really kinda dig her.. She reminds me of Megan mixed with Andrea ( my ex) , I have also decided that i am not gonna wait for Megan... I really love her..but i know she to will move on..or perhaps move back to her most recent ex ( then i will just say fuck it, and not even think their is a future between us) The sun was hot...so hot.. but when the sun set.. I went dancing with Ester again...god i love to see her move around , ugh... anyway .She went back to camp..and i drank 2 redbulls and went back out on the city..I danced at Illumanaughty , Magic Glasses..and that camp at 300 and esplinade..i dunno what they were called..but FUCK the music kicked ass.

Wednessday
Today Is the red party and our Cockheads went up tonight.. kurt performed on the stage, and he was Great.. Tomorrow i don't think we are gonna party but Friday Danya and Ian will be here so more entertainment.. Polaroid, Dae, and Nome DJed tonight , and I took off with Bernal ( who gave me some "E" ) and we went and danced the night away when we saw the sun cresting on the horizon we went home and sat on top of our stage and watch the sun rise through our two cocks ( the giant ones we built in our camp) W/ Brain and Nome..He played here comes the sun and Jason and Opel danced while me and Bernal just giggled , Brain was talking..but we paid no head to him..It was the perfect sunrise..I went and laid down under Esters shade structure..man it was hard not to wake her up for the sunrise or crawl up next to her..Ugh..I am a bit strange at this point.
---BTW tonight was the first night i Fire danced and that was at the red party at our camp

Thurseday
After the sunrise i went to sleep under the shade structure..and i know desert brain has kicked in I am really off the wall tonight Today i ate , drank, shat and slept.. then Wes gave me some more "e" and i took off into the desert to go dance with Bernal again...god it was fun...i cannot remember much of the details..but there was so much good music and great people out..i can still feel the energy that was present

Friday
Tomorrow is the burn, i stayed up all night again...and I was planning on getting some rest tonight..but it is not looking good , bernal has more "e" and we have some mushroom tea, and spaghetti to eat, plus Danya is performing and Ian is gonna be Crazy on stage until Eelane Kurt and or Danya start to perform...I just ate mushrooms and crashed...and slept all night..it was nice...

Sat
I woke up and i was in a bad mood, But what ever..the i slept almost all day the burn was great, I danced with Bernal again.. and Hugged ester really tight..and told Brain , that i would like to hook up with ester...He said that was Great, and he really wanted us to hook up..he said we had great energy together. I packed and crashed i have to leave at sunrise

Sunday
I don't think i have ever missed people so much in my life.. I Ran around when the sun rose and hugged all those who were awake..and right as i was about to leave, tears started to fill my eyes...I had not seen Ester..I shrugged and started my car , and low and behold ester walked around a tent and came into view...I ran out of my car...Tears still in my eye.. i Hugged her tightly and picked her up and span her around...I smiled so wide..and told her to call me when she gets back into town..i went into my car before she would notice tears filled my eyes and i took off...the drive was so rough..I kept fading into tears and almost dozing at the wheel, I don't think that I should have driven on so little sleep..but i had to leave early...I got home around 1:00 and thus ending my trip to BM

Reflections

I look back on my trip to BM just a day later and i see how much i changed just in who i am...I still Love Megan , and i still think destiny will bring us together..but right now we are apart..and perhaps we will not end up the same way that i still hope we will on the inside..but now i look back on my dream and wonder if perhaps Ester or even Nicole will prove to be a better match for me..I hope i will find out soon, i feel terribley alone since i have noone i can just hug and tell all my stories of the burn to..and now that i am in the cold cold bay area of san Fran , I don't know If i can wait another year to feel that kind of love again. Bernal and I will become great friends..that i know.. and perhaps this next year i will try to get more involved in Burningman , I do have the right contacts to do so. well perhaps i will write more of the Burn..but this is just the outline..the stories are told so much better and with more feeling face to face... and i don't even think i can tell these stories over the phone.. I need a hug, perhaps i will find one in the arms of a loved one or a fellow burner soon

Justeen of Dustfish , 195 and esplanade
Vartikk@aol.com
3 time Burningman veteran
Lost in the Dust
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