I realized that I have been letting my journal slide for the last week. It's not because I don't have anything to say. It's because I have so much to share that I don't know where to start. I don't know how far back to go, if I should recap at all.
I want to talk about Burning Man. I want to tell about all the fantastic people I met, the hugs I got from people that were so present in their own bodies that it was like being struck by lightning when they put their arms around me. On the night of the burn, a total stranger gently took my hand and poured a dozen or so glass marbles that had all been decorated with tiny little photos of Burning Man into it and disappeared into the crowd. I spent the rest of the night handing them out to all the BM virgins I met. A man in a monk's robes and devil horns whispered in my ear "I give you this gift in my name, the fall of man." and faded into the night. A sweet young boy, stopped me to say he had been following my dreds for an hour and that he'd had the most wonderful adventure. He was a virgin. I gave him one of the pretty marbles.
I want to write about Molly Mango and her stuffed whale, the recipient of so much loving energy that it was a palpable force when I held it to my chest to pour my own love in. And Natalie, there with her parents who came for some hot water for tea and ended up staying for breakfast cocktails.
Camp Love Potion was perfect this year. I got to have an all-nighter dancing and laughing with Lonnie, Alec and Robb on Friday and Tamim, Don, Lisa and Steve on Wednesday. Last year I had just met them, this year they are family. I made some new friends for life, renewed some old loves and learned to let go of the ones I fell in love with last year that I will likely never see again. It's the letting go part that's hard for me. I have to learn to imagine life without some of the most extraordinary people I have ever met, and I have to be OK with that. I am getting better at it every day. I have learned to take every second of bliss as its own reward and not become expectant of more and more of the same from the same person. It is this living in the moment that was my reward, my lesson that I will carry close to my heart forever.
One morning a gorgeous and happy couple came to our camp. She was done up in her sparkly finery and he was wearing snuggly pajama pants. They came into our camp and each poured out their love and blessings without reserve. He got on his hands and knees and purred and head butted his way around us like a big cuddly cat, allowing us to pet him and stroke his head. She gave us all a hug, one of the lightning strike ones. She kissed Jon, my husband and partner of 13 years, full on the lips for a few minutes and it made me so happy for him. I live this whole other life that he has no idea the beauty of, where kissing people is as valuable as a good long talk. He is too shy to live that way and it was great to see him get a taste of my world. Thank you beautiful lady for showing him that! She went around and opened heart chakras with a wave over her hand, “Open, open, open!” and a hug and a kiss. When they left, we all tried to determine whose friends they were, since they were so intimate and open. Turned out they were just wandering by sharing the gift of love. Whoo, I am flushed and glowing just writing about them. They made everybody’s day in camp that morning.
I have to go now, but I will write more when I have time.