Evil Mommy Tina (evilmommytina) wrote in burning_man,
Evil Mommy Tina

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Another Year... more disappointment...grieving...

Strong energy as today first tier tickets went on sale.  I had hoped to go last year, but it was not to be.  This year, well, no fucking chance in hell - because even if/when I do find a job, I am not going to be able to take time off for quite a while, and Fawn has other more pressing priorities for her vacation time.  I am relieved to not have money hiding away because I might be tempted to just buy tickets.  I feel torn.  On the bright side shouldn't I be relieved to not have to dig through the hellish garage to prep all our gear, buy stuff that we need, plan the trip, find a trailer for the playa... ?  But I am not relieved.  Instead I am mourning those exact same things... because doing all of that would mean there was a trip/vacation/get-away to look forward to in a time when none is possible.  The longer we are away - the less I remember the magic of the Playa.  That makes me sad. 

I am just blah about it... hell, about most everything lately.
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